(6) I Miss…

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dear mr & mrs bloggie…

 

You are allowed to give this entry a miss for it may be a tad sentimental. I’m just feeling sad, so shut up.

Last week, I was bored out of my wits so I took to reading my past entries in my blogspot. And I came across the one dated 19th April 2007.

It was dedicated to my girlfriend whose name was frequently written in my strawberry shortcake domain… ah…who else but Anna.

I remembered that one time, I was so overwhelmed with sadness, what the fact that she had to leave the country to pursue her dreams, I cried buckets. Ironic how now when she’s here in Singapore, the bond’s inevitably left astray.

I wasn’t there when she needed a shoulder to cry on. I was far too busy feeling sorry for myself to reach out a hand…for my friend…. Why, I became this brooding, angst-ridden child who thought her life pathetic and wanted all the attention from everyone…..

The short meet-up was one much appreciated, babe, I couldn’t even put it into words how much I loved every second of it. Though I might not look all too chirpy, I was grateful for every moment.

Sad isn’t it, the last time we met, back in 2007, we’re both crazily in love and who gives a damn about tomorrow. Boy were we naïve.

We were so blissfully happy, our constant double dates went past any reasons. And who could forget Irza and her family and, us. Laughter was never absent when all of us were together.

What happened to that?

I’m hoping to relive those days again. Would it ever be possible….

And then there’s me. When would the day come when fate decides to be against me. Or perhaps it has already arrived but undeniably I’m too stupid to see. Ha…I can just visualize someone nodding enthusiastically to that statement.

Ah, another conundrum for another day. Let’s rest with what’s ahead now….

As we, Anna and I, walked together towards my old workplace at Wheelock Place, another train of memories whizzed past me. (I’m getting old like this…)

I imagine the reason why I had a life then was because I was easily available for anyone. Be it coffee with Ayu or Aida, a game of Tai ti with Yaz and Anna or simply Taboo and Newton Circus with my cousins (the whole lot of you). And then, there are those whose names I’ve not mentioned.

All are missed, I swear. Yes, that includes you awak.

I’ve not changed, everyone, indeed I haven’t. I don’t have the time to meet but trust me, I’m still the same old me. If there’s one day that come by whereby I…. nevermind.

It won’t.

 

I miss the whole lot of you. I do, so much so I cry thinking about how much I’m losing out.

So to speak, I don’t want these slight differences (to come) erupt into huge disparity should that day meet. Please no.

Oh well now, I gotta go. Bet you guys are having a headache figuring out the meaning of this entry. Heck, don’t bother.

Truth be told, I’m too busy (emotional too, for that matter) to write a decent logical one. A better one next time ya.

Bye.

  

cinta
fasyalba 

p/s: I blame it on the belated PMS tantrums.

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